Years ago I heard from a friend who had visited a certain country which I'm not going to name, of the way they use paper there for the toilet. It was suitably disturbing and it has stuck in my memory ever since, making that country rank somewhere at the bottom of my list of Places to Visit One Day.
She said that in the bathroom there was a stack of squares of paper, each one about the size of a normal sheet of toilet paper. The paper, however was closer to the texture of newsprint. After trying to use it in the way she was accustomed and experiencing some difficulty, she bravely asked for an explanation. After some embarassed looks, someone showed her.
Basically, the piece of paper is folded in half and then half again, forming a small square. The point at which all the creases line up is then turned to the top, making a diamond shape. This point is carefully ripped off and kept. The square is opened, and using one's left hand, it is put over the index finger so that it looks a little like a hula skirt for the index finger. you then use that finger (yes the FINGER!!!!) to clean yourself off, and once you've finished, gather up the paper, squeezing it as you remove to get rid of the, um, dirt from your finger. You then discard the paper in the bin (not in the toilet). And that little point you ripped off at the beginning? That's for cleaning under your fingernail.
Ugh.
3 comments:
I need the name of that country - post haste.
As it is now at the top of MY list of Places NOT to Visit One Day!!!
This is all so hysterical. I love it. And by the way, the worst scenario are those horrid cloth towel dispensers!! That is truly gross, unsanitary, disgusting, etc. And, I'm not quite as obsessive/compulsive as you are, but I was laughing as you described your 'methodology'. I can totally relate!
Lots of love, Mara
Those cloth towel dispenser are a HORRIBLE idea! When we were on the gospel choir tour there seemed to be a plethora of them, and the vast majority of them had no more towel left! I watched many people (mostly Americans on the tour) walk up to it, not really know what to do, pull at it, nothing happens so they just dried their hands on the used towel bit!!! Ewwwww!
However we stayed in one hotel that had a bathroom near the lobby that was quite impressive. The bathroom was my idea place, no entry doors, a long curving entranceway, beautifully decorated, no need to touch anything. At the end, there was a towel dispenser thing. I approached it, and as I walked towards it, it automatically dispensed the allotted amount of pristine white, steaming towel. I was happy to use it and then watch in wonder as it sucked it away to that nether place where the used bit goes, and waited for the next person to get a fresh one. It was quite classy....
The worst is when you go into a public bathroom...let's say in Edinburgh-just for fun, and you forget to check if theres toilet paper. Well it turns out there isn't any in your stall...so you quickly slip into the only other stall which also doesn't have toilet paper. You are praying that there are paper towels but alas, no such luck. And now you are left with the option of using your hand, or walking around with wet undies. Well, I guess that's the price to pay for inattention to details!
Rae
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