Being Different

Istanbul is different. It's different from any place I've ever been in
and everyone else who I've spoken to about it agrees. Turkey was a
place very similar in culture and customs to most of the Middle East.
Then Mustafa Kemal Ataturk came along and changed everything. The
script, the laws, the way people dress, the way women are treated....
Everything. A top-down revolution. So what does that mean? Probably a
lot of stuff, and people much more capable than me have probably
analysed it to death. But the things that I've noticed have a lot to
do with this, I think. Turkey's uniqueness stems from the fact that
the culture is based in Islam(Sunni though, not Shi'ih), but the
country is technically secular. Ataturk changed the script from the
Arabic script to the Roman script (thus making it easy for foreigners
to come here and be able to read things like street signs and stuff).
If I understand correctly, the women's dress normally associated with
arab cultures was banned. So women were not allowed to wear the full
head to toe covering gear. Although, you still see them occasionally
(when I was here as an exchange student, we irreverently referred to
them as "Ninja women" and considered it good luck to see one). Women
who feel particularly religious wear colourful scarves on their heads
and long skirts.
Where am I going with this train of thought? I dunno.
Istanbul was described by one of my students as "very cosmopolitan
because it has people from all parts of Turkey". Hmmmmm... This is
what is considered diversity here, that explains a lot. 15 years ago I
quickly got used to people staring at me constantly everywhere I went.
Most people had never seen a black person except on t.v. I was here
again visiting last year and the year before and people stared, they
had seen black people in real life, but it was still a rare event.
Some of the other teachers have a big problem with being stared at by
Turks (who don't necessarily consider it impolite), but they all agree
that the staring that they get because of their blond hair or fair
skin (or one teacher who is Indian, who gets stared at because of her
dark skin) is nothing compared to what I get as a black person walking
around here with dark brown skin and crazy hair.
However, as I noticed 15 years ago and still notice today, the staring
and the comments that I get do not feel like a negative racist thing.
It is pure curiosity. I don't feel like when I walk into a store
people are staring at me because they think I will pick up something
and run out of the store with it. Very often, the stares are
accompanied by smiles. People encourage their children and little
toddlers to look at me, and I smile back at them and most of the time
the parents are more excited than the kids! I decided a long time ago
that if this is going to be people's only exposure to a black person,
then I had better make it a pleasant experience! My flatmate Lydia
thinks that it's a crazy idea. She hates being looked at, and with her
fair Irish skin, dark hair and blue eyes, people tell her that she
looks a lot like someone from the Black Sea region. People generally
don't pay her too much attention here, but the few that do really irk
her. She was amazed at how many people look at me as I walk down the
street, and for fun, she sometimes walks a few paces behind to
observe. It's really funny, I wish I could see things from that
perspective, the way people walk by and pretend not to look, then pass
me and stop to turn around and stare. She said people sometimes trip
and bump into other people as well.
The other thing that I noticed is that people think I'm beautiful.
This never happens anywhere else. I remember last year when I was here
with Lyndsay and Aida and Veronica, they were saying that Turkey does
wonders for your self esteem, because people, men and women, young and
old, are constantly telling you how beautiful they think you are. It's
true, they do. I realise that their exposure is really limited. They
see Turks constantly. Anyone who looks even a little different is
exotic and beautiful. It's very flattering and you have to not let it
go to your head :o)
It's a nice place to be though, when "different" is a good thing!